funny clean jokes about dogs

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What do you get when you cross a Rottweiler with a hyena?
I have no idea, but if it starts to laugh, I'm joining in.





Why is a noisy yappy dog like a tree?
They both have a lot of bark.

A man walks into his local vet and says "My dog Rover is cross-eyed, is there any way in which you can help him?"
"Hmm, let me take a look at him" says the vet as he picks up Rover.
Whilst holding the dog, the vet checks Rovers paws, eyes, teeth and tail until finally the vet says "I think I am going to have to put Rover down".
The man is shocked is shocked and says "Really? Just because he is cross-eyed?"
The vet then replies "No, because he is too heavy to hold any longer".

Man: Our dog is such a good, clever boy dear. He brings in a newspaper everyday
Wife: I guess that is pretty clever
Man: Yes, especially when we have never signed up or bought a subscription to any.

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I may have to get my dog’s tail removed unfortunately.
My mother in law arrives next month and I plan on getting rid of anything that gives her any idea that she is welcome.

I think that we can all agree that dogs are the superior pets (don't tell that to our cat overlords, though!). Besides being the cuddliest, most loving animals ever, they also brighten our days with their kooky antics and give us artistic inspiration with their snotty-nose-drawn pieces on house and car windows. Dog-cassos, if you will. Because of these unmistakable dog-ish traits - like cuteness, bizarre tail chases, and unfathomable smarts - pups are also a great material for jokes. So, this is our article dedicated solely to dog jokes, and one thing we can promise - it will brighten up your day tremendously! 

In this article, among the plethora of hilarious animal jokes, you might expect to find: corny puns, only the best one-liners, silly wordplays, and cute jokes. So, we're drawing to a conclusion here - the dog jokes are as diverse as the pups themselves, and without any doubt, only the goodest! How else would we talk about man's best friend if not in the words that are of the greatest quality and the most magical entertainment value? After all, dogs do deserve everything that's best, even when talking about silly jokes. 

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You know exactly what to do here - scroll just a bit further down to reveal our collection of these cute jokes. Some of them will leave you howling with laughter; others might even get added to your own personal collection of the best jokes that you've ever seen. Don't forget to vote for those! Finally, after all that is well and done, share this article with anyone in need of comedic relief! 

A dog goes into a bar and orders a martini. The bartender says, "You don't see a dog in here drinking a martini very often." The dog says, "At these prices, I'm not surprised."

"A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog's IQ. Here’s how it works: if you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you."

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